The Real First Thanksgiving ::: To bring the sacrifice of thanksgiving means to sacrifice your understanding of what is beneficial and thank God for everything because He is benevolent.
School has been rough the last couple of weeks. I don't know what changed, but for the first time I feel like I've found myself stuck in a rut where home-schooling just feels really hard.
I was not anticipating feeling like that at least until they are in junior high. So it's left me a bit shook up.
I found myself scouring all of the mom-blogs I read one day, somewhat desperately looking for any kind of encouragement. Anything to give me a step up out of the weary and discouraged pit I couldn't seem to get out of.
This did a good job of addressing the dilemma that is constantly looming over me.
This and this provided some much needed inspiration.
But this is the one that made me feel like maybe everything is going to be okay.
"I cannot mess up God’s plan for my children’s lives."
Words that spoke a truth I obviously should know, but I guess I had just lost sight of. What a full breath of fresh air these words felt like in the midst of my suffocating state. I could breathe again.
Here's what I'm coming to realize: home-schooling does not fit into a tidy little compartment of my life. I find myself subconciously wanting to separate it. To break my life into manageable pieces and address each piece one at a time.
Homeschooling, housekeeping, parenting, marriage, etc. I want to focus on one at a time, feel like I've succeeded at my goal with that one, and be able to walk away from it feeling accomplished.
And more than any of the others, this attitude comes out the strongest towards school.
It's killing me to realize how unrealistic this is.
How educating my kids is going to be all overlapped and tangled up between doing my laundry and paying my bills, and giving attention to my husband and making sure everyone is fed, and taking care of myself and raising three little girls.
Does that not sound a bit overwhelming to anyone else?
So my conclusion is that, as with pretty much every other part of my life, God is giving me a nice little look at my own insufficiency regarding homeschooling. An area I felt fully confident. Until now.
Most of the time it makes me want to cry. Or maybe even throw a bit of a grown-up fit. But I'm trying to see the beauty in another opportunity to trust Him more.
I was blessed by some time out with a friend a few nights ago. A fellow homeschooling mom. We swapped stories of our "harrowing" days at home with our children. It's always comforting to know we're not the only ones.
She told me that she's found a difference whenever she really stops. Prays. Gives her day to the Lord. Her day isn't magically perfect with all tasks accomplished, but she said everything is just okay, even though it's not perfect.
That's not something I often do. Because I'm too busy "doing". When I see things going downhill I start "doing" more and more as much as I can to try to salvage the day. It doesn't matter that I've been through this lesson before. I take my own way every single time. And it always fails me.
So I'm trying to slow down. Accept that as in all other ares of my life, if God is not first, all is in vain.
This being a holiday week has given us a much needed opportunity to set the normal subjects aside and just have fun with our learning.
Yesterday we read several books that gave us a fun history lesson. Then spent time discussing and making lists of the similarities and differences between the life of a pilgrim girl, and the life of three little girls in our house.
Played a homemade game similar to something we saw in one of the books. Soaked some pennies in vinegar to help us see why the little pilgrim used vinegar to polish their brass cooking pot.
Then the girls on their own drew and cut out paper dolls of all the people we'd read about.
It was a nice day.
A much needed break. Refresher. A reminder of how much can be learned in the midst of fun.
It made me start thinking about how I want to make enjoyment the bigger goal in all of our learning.
How is learning going in your home? Leave me a comment or a link. I'd love to hear from you.
My Mom Jeans ::: All the labels say "ultra low rise" which is code for "if you've had babies or are over age 17 your belly is gonna jingle right over it."
Why you will never see me naked ::: Freedom is knowing that your life isn't restrained by boundaries, but that it is kept safe by them.
how to hear the music… ::: It matters that you get up in the morning and do what has been placed in front of you and use whatever has been placed in your hands. … There is no "Arrival" gate in life. You are already, today, doing the plan.
